As we got closer to Mother’s Day last week, I did not know what to expect. I did not know what I would feel. This was supposed to be my first Mother’s Day with children in my home. It is heart breaking. Then again, we protected those two boys and they are where they should be. It is joyful. The fact that the two sons we fell in love with were imaginary constructions developed by people who would defraud us, well it is just mind blowing.
More than anything else, I was not sure how I would (or should!) be treated on the holiday. I had plenty of people to celebrate…and lots of adoption moms to celebrate with! But the reality was that I do not have children in my home.
I feared pity.
I also feared being forgotten.
I had posed a hypothetical question to myself:
“What does a person say to a woman in my position on Mother’s Day?”
While I could not have told anyone what to say, ultimately three friends wished me a happy Mother’s Day…and they each got it right. One wrote:
“Even though you never brought home the boys, I know you thought of them as yours. Love you friend! Happy Mother’s Day.”
Acknowledgement and love with no hint of pity. I am blessed with wonderful friends. And now I think I have a better idea of how to handle tough holidays like this one. Thank you girls for setting such a strong example.